Frowsty
by Soyna
Summary: Zack and Tseng are on a mission that requires them to use chocobos.  Tseng really hates the chocobo that he is riding and ends ups wet and cold and Zack warms him up.  Yaoi.


By: Albedosreqium / Soyna

**Warnings and Genre:  
**Mature, Yaoi and humour!

**Setting:**  
Crisis Coreish

**Disclaimer  
**All related Final Fantasy names and characters are copyrighted by the almighty Square Enix©.

**Summary:**

Tseng really doesn't like chocobos and Zack is high on that list as well. I want you to meet my two new OCs: Smoky (a nasty grey chocobo) and Edmund (a well-behaved black chocobo), who are quite the characters, even if they are birds.

This is a kiriban prize for VVkiti who won it. She wanted a Zack and Tseng that was a little bit of smexy. Here it is.

* * *

**FROWSTY**

* * *

The day had been a very trying day for Tseng. He was tired, sore, wet and cold ... and it was the fault of two creatures - a stupid grey chocobo and an overly excited puppy whom went by the name of Zackary Fair.

It was both their fault that he ended up standing mid-thigh in murky, smelly swamp water, and there was not a single part of him that was not covered in swamp grime.

Tseng was never a fan of the chocobos. There were much more efficient ways of traveling, but through swamp land – other than flying over it – there was no other way to get through. Shin-Ra's hovercrafts would fail in that area due to the rather sharp plants and monsters that were attracted to the sounds, so it made having to ride the birds the only viable option.

It had been raining as well, which made the trip even less enjoyable. He would have to talk to whomever gave him the weather information because the information he was given was wrong - so very wrong. He had the rain gear, but it didn't matter when stuck in swamp mire.

Every part of him felt as if ice was touching him, as the rain had been freezing, as he rode across the swamp on the temperamental bird that did not want to obey him. He had to keep digging his heels into the side of the bird to keep it moving, or pulling on its beak with the reins to make it turn the right direction.

Highly trained and specialized birds were most definitely a lie.

Zack seemed to have no problem with his mount. Zack was lucky enough to retain a black chocobo, named Edmund, which seemed to have an easy temperament. Zack constantly ruffled the black feathers behind its crest and cooed at it and the bird kwehed right back at him. It was annoying to see Zack enjoying his ride so much.

Tseng did not like his bird at all. The grey chocobo, Smoky, seemed rather calm at the ranch as he saddled it, but as soon as they walked into the swamp it became nearly impossible to manage. No amount of gentle coaxing would make the bird behave. He resorted to threatening to pull out its crest once or twice in an effort to get it to follow the black chocobo that Zack was riding. Every time that he would try to make the bird behave, it would toss its head and wark loudly at him in response.

He really hated chocobos.

Zack would smile back with an amused look as they trudged through the dark and stinky swamplands. The Second Class SOLDIER seemed greatly amused at the fact that Tseng was having such a miserable time.

"Chin up, Tseng!" Zack yelled back as he turned in his saddle. "We're almost at the Mythril Caves! We can dry off there."

He just nodded. Tseng had been looking forward to getting off the bird and into the caves. It would be dry there, they could have a fire and he could rest and let Zack be on watch. He wasn't that wet yet, the rain coat and hat that he was wearing was doing its job reasonably well at that point, but he was cold and hardly comfortable in this situation.

Tseng could see the light at the end of the figurative tunnel. It was just a few more forced strides to get off the swampy ground when Smoky decided to stop and gave out a horrendously loud wark and just about bucked him off.

"What the hell is your problem now?" he yelled in frustration and kicked the side of the bird. The bird gave another wark and started backing up. Tseng had never been more tempted to pull out his gun and shoot. He knew it would get him nowhere, but it sure would make him feel better.

He yanked on the reins and yelled a bit more at the bird when suddenly Zack and Edmund were coming right for him. Zack had his sword drawn and posed to strike. He didn't have time to ask what his problem was as Zack's voice boomed, "Down!"

He threw himself against the bird's neck and nearly lost his balance. He turned to see what he was ducking against and he saw a snakelike creature emerge from underneath his chocobo's feet. He twisted himself around and tried to steer the chocobo away from the snake, but Smoky kept moving into the monster's path.

"Listen to me you stu …" was all that he got out when he saw a similarly sized monster emerge in front of him. The large fang-filled mouth hissed loudly. He didn't have much time to react as he reached for his gun and tried to pull it out. He heard something from behind him. Hopefully Zack was taking care of the monster that he could no longer see as he tried to concentrate on the one in front of him.

The snake darted forward and Tseng instinctively threw himself to the side and was barely able to stay on Smoky. He tried to get Smoky to move out of range but the bird had a different opinion on what had to be done. The bird decided that it wanted to fight now and threw its wings wide and tried to peck the snake.

Tseng cursed as the reins were torn from his hands and he was forced to hold onto the dirty, wet feathers. He was just gaining control of his seat again and was trying to raise his gun to shoot at the monster when he heard a yell.

"Tseng! Watch out!"

He tried to turn to see what Zack was warning him about when he felt a great weight strike the side of Smoky. He saw the black blur of Edmund and Zack which were the culprits of the hit.

The next thing he knew he was in the swamp. The cold and wet had knocked the wind out of him as he struggled out of the mire. Only to emerge with a horrible gasp to see the corpses of two dead snakes. The fact that his pesky mount was already racing to the shore and Zack was looking down at him with his hand over his mouth did not help his mood.

Tseng pulled himself up and stood, thigh-high in swamp mire, and looked up at Zack with a disapproving look.

"You okay?" Zack asked and sounded way too amused for his liking.

"Perfectly fine," Tseng said through his clenched teeth. He could see that Smoky was sitting on the shore and preening its feathers. He couldn't help but grumble as he tried to take a step forward.

He was horrified for when he tried to move, his shoe was suddenly lost into the mire. He staggered forward and nearly fell again but regained his balance.

Zack chose that moment to laugh as he nudged Edmund forward and offered his hand down to Tseng. He never hated another person as much as he hated Zack at that moment. His boots didn't even have a lick of grime on them.

He took the offered hand, allowing Zack to effortlessly pull him up. Edmund warked in protest as Tseng was unceremoniously dragged across Zack's lap.

Zack chuckled. "You know, Tseng," he said patting his back. "I think this is the first time I have seen you with even a hair out of place. When you go all out, Tseng, you go all out."

Tseng fumed as they rode back to the shore and he could feel the amusement coming from the SOLDIER. He was grateful when they arrived at the shore and he was able to get out of the undignified position. Zack lowered him to the ground and started to laugh as he stumbled on the cold rock with only one shoe. He was horrified to find that he had lost his sock to the mire as well.

He stood in front of Smoky who was looking at him with its head cocked to the side and it made a kwehing sound. Tseng was cold and shivering and everyone else around him didn't look the least bit concerned.

"Stupid bird," Tseng grumbled and refrained from swatting the creature.

He was unbelievably cold and was starting to shiver as he looked back over the swamp. There was no sign of the small battle that occurred as it was swallowed up by the murky waters. He was grateful that the icy rain was letting up a bit, but it was still way too cold for his liking and he felt his teeth start to chatter.

He heard a small clicking type of sound and he turned sharply to see Zack holding up his PHS and a large smug grin on the SOLDIER's face.

"What the hell are you doing?" he yelled.

The phone clicked again. "This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. This may never be seen again." There was another click. "I have to have a picture of this." Zack's grin was large as he closed his phone before he placed it in his pocket and dismounted.

"You look a little cold. Let's get you warmed up." Zack pointed to the entrance of a cave. "I'll see if I can find something to burn," Zack said as he grabbed the reins of Edmund and Smoky and started to lead them towards the cave entrance.

Tseng noted that Smoky seemed to obey Zack just fine.

Tseng was grateful to get out of the elements but there wasn't much warmth inside the cave. The wet, icy cold of the swamp was now changed to a glacial stone cold.

Zack pulled a sleeping roll off Edmund and directed him to a nook that had been used by travelers before. He tucked the chocobos into a corner where he tied their reins to an outcropping.

"Take your rain gear off," Zack said. "We need to get you dry. You can use my blanket to wrap yourself in."

Tseng tried to control his chattering teeth and hated how his limbs were starting to shake. He took the blanket and Zack started to shuck his rain gear. It wasn't fair that Zack was dry under his outer clothing.

"I'll go search for something to make a fire," Zack said and started to walk deeper into the cave.

Tseng shakily started to remove his outer layers, getting colder as he did so. By the time he got to his white shirt, his fingers were no longer cooperating with him and he couldn't undo the buttons. His hands were vibrating so much and he couldn't even feel the small, plastic circles.

He forced his fingers to move and fumbled with the shirt, eventually undoing it. He let it fall to the ground instead of folding in on his jacket. He reached for the blanket and tugged on it, anxious to have the scratchy cloth wrapped around his shoulders.

The blanket refused to move to his command as it remained where it was on the floor.

Tseng thought for a minute that he was weaker from the cold than he thought, when he saw the bird that was part of the problem having its large, clawed foot on the blanket he was trying to cover himself with.

Smoky just cocked its head to the side and kwehed at him.

He really couldn't hate a bird more. "Move your g-goddamn f-foot, you s-stupid bird," he stammered through chattering teeth. He tried to get his fingers to wrap around the scratchy fabric and pull it away from the bird. His fingers gripped but there was no strength in them.

He could have sworn the bird purposely tugged at the blanket with its big talon.

Tseng never so much wanted to kill something more in his life than how he did at that moment. He wished he hadn't lost his gun in the swamp. At least then they would have something to eat when Zack got back with something to warm them with. He looked in the beady eyes of the creature and tugged at the blanket once more.

"I h-hate you," Tseng said as he couldn't get the blanket out from the bird's talon.

The bird kwehed and turned its head in the other direction before it lifted its foot and went over to where Edmund was resting. Tseng watched the bird make a big show of curling behind the other and resting its head on the darker one's back.

Tseng put the blanket over his shoulders but it didn't feel any warmer. He turned his back on the warm-looking birds and tried to work on taking off his soaked pants. He still couldn't feel his fingers as he tried to get them off.

That was when Zack returned. "Aw, look at those two," Zack said as he looked at the chocobos. "Aren't they just adorable together?"

"Ch-Charming," Tseng said through his chattering teeth.

He heard Zack drop something. He turned to see that he must have found a stash of wood somewhere in the cave and he placed it in a small groove that had been used by other travelers.

"You still have your wet clothes on," Zack said as he turned to him.

"Th-thanks for the observation," Tseng said and finally succeeded in undoing the top button of his pants.

"Are you okay, Tseng?" Zack asked. He could see the SOLDIER giving him a look of pity. He didn't like to be pitied.

"Start the d-damn f-f-f …" Shivers took his whole body and he was unsuccessful in getting the last word out. His knees gave out and he fell forward. He didn't feel his knees hitting the ground and was prepared for his face to hit first when strong arms suddenly wrapped around him.

It was painful being touched. Zack's leather-clad hands seemed so harsh against his skin.

"Whoa," Zack said, his voice thick with concern, "you're an ice cube."

Tseng didn't bother to respond. His teeth were chattering too hard for him to get words out.

"Well, I guess I have to take care of you, huh?" Zack seemed amused, but Tseng certainly was not. Zack chuckled.

He felt the blanket being moved off his chest and he protested with a moan, but didn't have the strength to argue and fight. It was humiliating to have the young man reach down with his leather gloves. "Wow, you really are an ice cube."

"F-fire," Tseng stammered as he was too cold to even blush as he felt his stiff, wet pants dragged almost painfully down his thighs. Zack at least was allowing him to keep some of his dignity by keeping the blanket firmly around him as he took off his pants.

"No underwear, Tseng," Zack whispered as he threw the pants aside and reached down to remove his only remaining sock from his blue-looking foot. "Naughty."

"Shut up," he chattered and would have blushed if he wasn't so cold.

Zack chuckled and led him to sit beside the chocobos.

"I d-don't want to be anywhere near those birds," he grumbled as Zack directed him to sit down, but he didn't have much of a choice but to obey.

"They'll keep you warm until I can get a fire going and can warm you up properly," Zack said and pushed him against Edmund. At least it wasn't Smoky. The bird's feathers were warm and he found himself trying to curl in closer to the bird. It would have been enjoyable if Smoky didn't swing its head over and start pecking at the blanket.

"Fuck. Right. Off," he snarled at the bird and tried to keep a firm grip on the blanket, even though he could feel it slipping.

The bird was not at all threatened by his gaze or tone of voice, but reached forward and pecked at the blanket again. He really wished he had the strength to kill the bird for all the humiliation that he was being put through.

He heard the sizzle of a spell being cast. He turned his head to see that Zack had used Fire, and the light from the flames filled the little alcove. "There, that will warm things up around here."

Zack turned around and looked down at him. He had a much too amused grin on his face.

"You can f-fuck off too." Tseng shivered as he watched the SOLDIER start to take off his gloves and threw them beside his wet clothes.

"Aw, come on, Tseng. Lighten up," Zack said with a horribly large smile for Tseng's liking, and then there was the matter of Zack taking pictures of him looking dishevelled. He did not want anyone to see those pictures.

Zack started to take off his belt guard and let it drop to the ground.

Tseng tried to ask what he was doing but his chattering teeth and a sudden pulling of his hair caused the words to fail. He pulled away from the sharp beak of the bird that warked at him angrily.

He ran his hands over his hair to make sure that the sharp beak hadn't cut any of it off. Thankfully there didn't seem to be any missing, and he turned back in time to see Zack undoing his sweater and starting to roll it off.

"What are you doing?" Tseng's full attention was on Zack now as he stood completely shirtless and his hands were moving down to his pants. Tseng gripped the blanket tightly as Smoky tried to pull it off of him yet again.

"Going to get you warm," Zack said as he undid his buckles and zipper. "Body heat is the best way to do so."

Tseng tried to protest but words were stopped in his mouth as he watched Zack step out of his pants. He didn't remember him taking off his boots earlier but he must have done so when he was preoccupied with the bird trying to strip his hair and steal his blanket.

"No homo, alright?" Zack said as he walked forward with only boxers on.

He heard Reno use that phrase before even though Reno was almost certified gay. He just nodded his head and tried to keep his teeth from chattering. That was when the blanket was tugged away and whatever warmth that he had built up was suddenly gone.

Zack laughed and reached over to take the blanket from Smoky. "This isn't your blanket, Smoky," Zack said as he patted the now upset bird's head. "You got feathers, we need this."

Tseng made a mental note to make sure that Smoky was 'put out to pasture' when they got back.

Smoky relinquished the blanket with a loud wark of protest and then rested its head on the back of Edmund as though pouting.

Zack patted the bird's head and then suddenly was touching him. His hands were like fire against his skin. Tseng hissed at the abruptness of the touch as it hurt to feel that warmth. The blanket wrapped around his shoulders again and Zack pushed him against the warm feathers of the black bird.

He hissed and shivered as the burning body pressed against his. Warm calloused hands rubbed his upper arms and he felt the SOLDIER's warm chest press against his. Zack let out a few curse words. "You're frozen to the core."

He didn't argue about it. Feeling the burning heat against him made the cold all the more there. He wanted to press against Zack and run away from him at the same time. He struggled to keep his dignity for a moment before he rested his forehead in the crook of Zack's neck and gave in. He allowed Zack to pull him into an embrace more fully and allowed those large, warm hands to wander.

Between Zack's wandering hands and the small fire that was in the nook, he soon felt himself warming up. Zack's touches no longer hurt but became comforting and almost soothing. The SOLDIER's hands no longer roamed his whole body to warm him, but now stroked his arms and back. Tseng figured he must have dozed off during the whole process because he finally noticed that Zack was talking. He started to listen to what Zack was saying as he continued to drowse in the comfort of the SOLDIER's embrace.

He knew Zack was a talker. He had heard others complain when they went on missions with Zack. He would talk anyone's ear off with his constant chatter.

"… and the guy just walked right through the door right in front of me with his back turned. It was the silliest sneak attack that I ever encountered." Zack chuckled and Tseng felt the SOLDIER's hands wander to his neck and rub there. Tseng relaxed further into that touch and he was pretty sure that Zack must have thought he was sleeping. The fingers massaged him gently as the other hand stroked the lower part of his back and almost was resting on the curve of his bottom.

"Your hair is still silky despite how it smells. I always thought your hair would be silky. If you knew I was doing this, you would most likely hand me my ass in a sling." He felt Zack's hand grip his ass now and it almost made him want to tell him to get control of himself and his so called 'No homo' statement being false from how he was applying his attentions. "You fill out those dress pants the best out of any of the Turks. I never thought I'd get to see you without your pants at all. Never even see you in the gym. I figured you must have your own private gym or something so you don't have to work out with us lowlifes, but I always wondered what you would have looked like in work out clothes."

The hand relented and moved back up to rubbing his lower back, but he still kept the other nestled in his hair. Zack didn't realize how sensual and comforting that simple touch was and Tseng was trying to control his warming body reaction to it.

Zack sighed and Tseng felt his breath against his forehead. Then he felt soft lips press against him. "Angeal warned me that Turks were too dangerous to mess with, but he didn't say that they were so damn cuddly. I swear you fit just right."

Tseng had to admit that it did feel rather good to be in Zack's arms. Zack was a larger man and Tseng seldom allowed himself to become attracted to someone that could physically overpower him. Having those rules usually left any SOLDIER out of the picture as Tseng could sneak, shoot and intimidate, but with pure strength, he was no match.

But then he was starting to think that his decision about that was misplaced. There was something about being cradled by the SOLDIER and having the stronger man take care of him. He pressed his face further into Zack's neck and the grip around his torso increased as his body gave out an involuntary shiver.

"We'll get this silly mission over with tomorrow, and you can kill the bird." Zack shuffled slightly and removed his hand from the back of his neck and then it trace down his shoulder blades. "You hear that, Smoky? After this, you're on the barbeque. I know how much Tseng hates you right now, and I'll try to save you, but I doubt that I'll be able to stop him." Zack chuckled. It was nice hearing him laugh, and the rumble went through his chest. It sent shivers through his spine, stomach and to his groin that was pressed against Zack's. The bird gave out a wark as if he understood what was being said.

Tseng ignored it and found his own arms snaking around Zack's chest and he held him near. Zack made a small grunting noise and adjusted his hold as well. The adjustment made it all the more apparent that he was not the only one that was getting warm from this predicament.

Tseng could very much get used to having such a large man holding him. He wiggled a little closer and felt the smooth fabric of Zack's boxers pressed against him. The colour flooded to his cheeks as he started to think what was hiding beneath them and the evidence of excitement that was pressing from beneath the soft fabric.

'No Homo' indeed from the hardness that brushed up against him and the fact that Tseng was warm enough to start reacting in an unprofessional matter. He kept his eyes closed and pretended to remain asleep, but his body was giving him away.

Zack made a small grunt and then let out a long groan. "Damn it all. That feels good," Zack whispered and rocked against him.

It did feel good. He should tell the SOLDIER to stop. It would be the right thing to do, but this … felt nice. Tseng found his own hips grinding against him. He opened his eyes a bit and looked down at their bodies. He could see where they were connected and he was beginning to wish that Zack had taken off his boxers before he had come to warm him up. He would have liked to have known what direct contact would feel like.

"I'm so glad that you lost your gun in the swamp, because you'd kill me for what I'm going to do next," Zack whispered. Tseng was about to 'wake up' after that statement but the quick and strong movements of the SOLDIER stilled any words that were coming out of his mouth. The hand that had been on his arm or side was now in front and boldly grabbing his member.

Tseng didn't hold back his gasp as the other calloused hand of the SOLDIER seemed to be removing his boxers, or at least freeing himself from them. Tseng felt completely manhandled as no matter what direction he tried to move the hands directed him to a certain way so that he was now both naked under the blanket and one large hand was gripping both of their cocks—pressing them together.

"It's not gay," Zack said, in defence. "It's just SOLDIERs' comfort."

It was amazing how many terms there were for gay acts not being gay, but he didn't protest. He was not in denial about his sexuality, but if Zack still was, Tseng wasn't going to burst his bubble.

"And it'll make sure that you're warm," Zack said as his hand started to move in a steady stroking motion with him squeezing at a pleasant pace. Tseng didn't say a word as Zack did this action. He pressed his face into his chest and wrapped his arms around the impossibly warm man.

Zack started to pump his hips against him and Tseng found his own hips betraying his thoughts as the friction from the soft foreskin and the rough hands was quite distracting and thrilling. He closed his eyes and let the SOLDIER comfort him. He did not mention the fact to the man that he was a Turk, not a SOLDIER, to ruin the fun.

It felt surprisingly good to have someone else in control and leading all the interactions. It was even better because Zack was in denial about things being anything more than comfort. Tseng wanted more and his hips moved to demand that he do so. He wasn't going to let his or Zack's pride get in the way of the moment.

"So warm." Zack hummed and sped up his movements.

Tseng found himself arching his back to allow easier movement of Zack's hand and pressed his face into his chest. He refrained from wanting to lick his chest and just allowed his hands to roam in encouragement. He kept his lips shut so that he wouldn't make any sound; Zack was making enough for the both of them.

"This'll get your blood stirring," Zack panted and his hand moved quicker, his hips jerking sharper. "Better than any exercise to get the blood –unh- through your lips -. I mean limbs." Zack's pace increased again and he could feel a slick substance being spread across his belly that was making it hard to keep his own sounds under control. "Tseng," Zack whispered between pants and he increased his grip and motion.

Tseng should not have been allowing this, and in most situations that would have been the case, but he did feel like he needed a little bit of stress relief after having to deal with the rain, the chocobo and an over-sexed SOLDIER who was in denial about being gay.

He thrust his hip forward and into the warm hand as he wasn't going to last for much longer. It seemed that Zack was close as well.

His body wanted to rush to the end point and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He pressed his face into the crook in the SOLDIER's neck as his stomach roiled and his mind went blank.

Tseng felt the warmth increase on his belly and he knew that it wasn't just his own seed, as Zack's movements became jerky and he let out a low moan. The hand squeezed him almost painfully but he didn't complain, and he slowly tried to regain his breath.

Zack kept them like that for a moment so he could gain his composure. Zack then reached out of the blanket to grab something to wipe them clean with. He didn't say anything as he did so, and Zack tucked himself back into his boxers.

"There's three hours until daylight. Get some sleep. I'll wake first and get some rations ready and make sure your clothes are dry before you put them on. And I'll make sure that Smoky doesn't steal your blanket and we get this done."

Tseng just nodded to the commands. He didn't say anything as Zack ran a hand up his neck again and began to rub his scalp. Tseng could only nod. The trying day and the 'SOLDIER's comfort' had taken the toll on him. He gladly allowed his eyes to close and truly slept.

* * *

"If I hear that click one more time, you will lose more than your phone," Tseng growled as he looked over at Zack who looked as if he had just got out of a shower. It wasn't fair that Zack looked absolutely pristine in his clothes, where as he looked like … like … Reno.

He looked down at his horribly rumpled pants and frowned. What made it worse was that he only had one shoe and his other foot was just donned in a sock. His shirt was now a sickly brown colour that seemed to match the swamp water that he got thrown into.

And his clothes had a slight smell to them, but it wasn't completely unbearable. Even his rain gear smelled as he packed it away into a bag.

He was grateful to Leviathan that it was not raining today, but if Leviathan really was in his favour, he would be on a nice, sleek Hardy Daytona motorcycle rather than the chocobo that was refusing to get up from its resting place beside Edmund. Smoky had stolen the blanket at the first chance that it could and now draped it over its back with pride.

It really was a shame that he didn't have his gun.

Zack tucked his phone away into his pocket and ran his hand through his hair with a sheepish little laugh before he got the birds ready to go. Edmund got up and ruffled its feathers. It warked and seemed eager to go. Smoky just adjusted the blanket on its back and glared.

"It's only a day more, Smoky," Zack said as he tried to get the bird up. It took a couple of minutes but Zack managed to get the stubborn bird ready to go.

He was not looking forward to the ride but this was the only choice. The rations that they had for breakfast did not taste right, and he was pretty sure that they had been dunked in the swamp and Zack was lying to him about that.

He wanted a shower and an unrumpled suit.

The rest of the trip to the meeting point was uneventful and the information was exchanged without problems, other than his contact pinching his nose or sniffing at him. They had another half day travel to Junon before he could properly go through the information that he was given.

He asked the man if he had a cold but he just shook his head and turned pale as they talked before they went on their separate ways. He was anxious to get to Junon, have a shower, and take a helicopter back to Midgar where he could sleep in a bed.

His first priority would to obtain the pictures that Zack's took and clear them from his phone before they got into anyone's hands.

Smoky behaved on the last part of the trip, which he was grateful for, the swamp must have been making the bird uneasy as the only real issue was that it wanted to run, so he had to keep the reins pulled tight.

Zack was more talkative. He may have been talking like that in the swamp, but Tseng was too busy concentrating on not dying, getting wet and dealing with the disagreeable bird. Zack continued to talk about useless information and babbling. Tseng concentrated on the thoughts of becoming clean.

He was never so happy to see the stables in Junon and it seemed that Smoky was too, because the bird didn't let him dismount before it ran into a stall, and he ended up in a pile of straw.

When he stood, he noticed that Zack was sliding his phone back into his pocket with a crooked smile on his face. He finally got off the bird and got one of the stable boys to deal with the temperamental creature.

"Hey, Boss Man."

He turned to see Reno sauntering his way into the stable.

He looked over at him and watched him wrinkle his nose and wave his hand over his face. "Whoa."

"What's the problem, Reno?" Tseng said as he handed over the small package. "What is with that face?"

Reno took the small package and then took a couple of steps back. "Yo, you stink!" Reno said, "And you're a mess."

"Stink?" Tseng knew that he wasn't a fresh as he normally was, but was it really necessary to rub it in like that? He did remember that Zack had said something about his hair smelling funny and he knew he needed a shower, but he doubted that it went so far as stinking.

Zack dismounted off Edmund and stood beside him, not even bothering to hide the smile. Zack patted his shoulder. "You shouldn't be so rude, even if he is frowsty." He felt Zack run a hand through his hair at the back of his neck and then give him a pat on the back.

"Frowsty?" Tseng responded with a frown as he eyed the SOLDIER.

"I work with Genesis, I pick up some big words from time to time," Zack said and smiled at Reno. "Are you our ride back home?"

"Only if Mr. Frowsty has a bath, yo. Seriously, Boss, did you have to roll in the swamp?" Reno held his nose.

Tseng frowned, not amused at all by being called stinky. He snorted. "We will be ready to go as soon as we wash up."

"We?" Zack said as Tseng took him by the arm. He actually enjoyed making the SOLDIER nervous and the more reason in front of Reno who was looking on amused. "I'm fine."

Tseng smirked as he put his arm around his waist, still guiding him out the door. "I think we should make things quick and share a shower together."

Zack looked panicked as Tseng slipped his hand in his belt and briefly rubbed that stomach. He made sure his grip was firm as he allowed himself to smile as he leaned against the bigger man.

Zack gave out a hesitant laugh, "T-Tseng, you know, I said, 'no homo' and all that." He was tense. Tseng was amused by the reaction but allowed him to get his goal, which was the phone that he had tucked away in the belt. He got a hold of it and then moved away from the nervous man.

"Hey!" Zack protested.

Tseng quickly started to walk out of the stable.

"That's my PHS! I need that!"

"I will return this once I have divulged the pictures," Tseng said simply as he passed by Reno who was holding his nose and backed against the wall.

"But," Zack protested again, but Tseng kept on walking. He frowned at the pictures on the phone. He couldn't let such undignified pictures of himself become public.

He did hear Reno say that he would go 'no homo' with him at any time, as he walked away from the stable. Zack would have his hands full with fighting off Reno's advance while he washed and purged himself and the PHS.

* * *

**Frowsty ** PRONUNCIATION: (FROU-stee) MEANING:adjective: Musty: having a stale smell.

Ain't I a bitchy bird! Smoky is my avatar and , yes, I named my avatar!

The black chocobo is named after Edmund Blackadder! - I luv Rowan Atkinson! :iconblackasdderplz: It was not in my poll but it was awesome!

And this was for VVKiti who won my Kiriban . Sorry it took so long. I do get distracted way too easily and my brain is nothing but a muddled mess as of late. I hope it straightened out now.


End file.
